Aren’t We All So Judgy

Two years ago one of my greatest fear was being judged by others. I would wake up every single day in hopes that throughout my day, no one misinterprets my intentions, judge me based on what rumours they hear about me or my shortcomings. I believe I speak for the masses when I say that one of our fears not only as teenagers but as a human being in this world is being judged by others. We walk around the school hallway trying not to make eye contact with those who might perceive us the wrong way; trying not to arouse this evil piece of judgment that lies between everyone’s hearts. Judgment is like the numbers of pie; it’s inevitable. I know there are endless ways that we judge others however there are three main reasons that all other categories seem to fall under.

Firstly is Morality. Imagine yourself at the beginning of the school year. You don’t know anyone at KIS and you’re finding it difficult to talk to people; socializing is just not your strengths. Everyone seems to already know each other – from what appears to be years – and you feel some type of pressure to have SOMEONE, so you play it safe by observing people and see how they treat others and create judgment based on that. I have done this a thousand times because I am one of those people who like to play it safe too. Morality is especially about whether people treat others in a “principle” and “correct” methods. Trustworthiness, sincerity and honesty, are a few examples of morality judgments. Secondly, we have sociability. Correct me if I’m wrong but don’t we all want to associate ourselves with people who are likable, friendly and kind? We judge others based on how much they treat other people in ways to promote affectionate relationships. Lastly, we have competence. Judging someone’s competence is essentially determining how capable we think that person is at accomplishing their goals. This includes judgment on someone’s skillfulness, intelligence and confidence.

I know some of you are questioning why morality? We all have this idea that people judge people based on how they look first before anything else, which is true. However, a study was conducted that asked individuals what was the most crucial piece of information to acquire to create an impression on a stranger. With the options provided, the majority were more interested in learning about someone’s moral character than other traits. Morality is at the top of the ladder because it is the driving force behind how we determine whether we think sociability or competence are positive qualities. Sociability and competence show us how well an individual can reach their goals however their moral reveals what those goals are. If one carries good moral goals, then we like them if they are sociable and competence because we assume they can achieve those goals. However, if a person has immoral goals, then we are likely to dislike them, although they are sociable and competent. In a case like this, those traits provide us with a clue of someone being able to achieve those immoral goals.

In my previous article, I clearly expressed the main reason why we judge people and in this article, I have discussed the three main ways we judge others. I don’t know about you, but I feel as though judgment has been explored in a not so negative light with the articles I have written so far. Of course the negative will always be there but I have enjoyed learning something new through this so-called wicked term Judgment. Looking back two years ago, I wish someone would have patted me on the back and said “you can never please people. You can never please everyone. You can just be yourself and leave it to them to chose to accept you”.  But I guess it’s now my responsibility to remind that myself every day 🙂

Sources


http://socialpsychonline.com/2016/10/judging-people-psychology/

https://jeffthewriter.com/dealing-judgment/

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